Mixed Feeling

i am crazy.

i am stressed.

i am excited.

i am frantic.

i am worried.

this is usually what happens when i need to travel and leave the clan. eventhough it is only for a day.

you see, i will be conducting a training session in one of the hotels in Bukit Bintang tomorrow. so, the company booked one room for the trainer so that the trainer will NOT be late it would be easier for logistic purposes.

that means i will have to leave the kids and hubby at home.

why not take them?!

well, there are many facts:

• kids will want to go swimming, and later get tired and cranky
• have to think of where to take the kids for dinner
• hubby will get his uncontrollable urge to errr ehem ehem on the hotel bed
• night feeds
• early morning feeds
• early morning seperation anxiety
• mind wondering what the kids are doing upstairs while doing training

and all this while trying to prep myself for the training.

so, no way jose.

thats why i decided to go and stay there with my colleague gilfriend.

and 2 other girlfriends will be crashing over..but i told them there are rules to follow:

• No HARD ROCK CAFE
• no karaoke sessions
• no club/bar hopping
• NO HARD ROCK CAFE
• no shopping spree
• don't include me in swimming sessions
• NO HARD ROCK CAFE
• no late night gossip/giggling sessions

as i would have to start working at 700am on Saturday.

owh, the NO HARD ROCK CAFE is just me telling myself. to sedapkan hati sendiri.

looking forward for some 'me-time' with the girls, eventhough just for a night!

How To Make Jasmine Happy - Tip #1

it is really easy to make my princess happy.

just make her a bowl of Maggi.

(yess...i can hear the shocked gasps coming from other mothers out there! this woman allows/feeds her children Maggi!? how could she?!)

to make it even worse, I graduated as a Food Technologist.

HAH! try to top that!

well, yes, I do allow Jasmine to have Maggi. and it is really funny(?) (dunno what word to use here) when you see her eyes instantly sparkle and light up when you tell her that yes, she can have Maggi for dinner. (another gut-wrenching, almost dying gasp from the Mommies out there)

and yesterday night, i asked her if she wanted to have dinner. when she said yes, i told her that i have a suprise for her. i told her i was cooking Maggi for her.

she ran from the couch and instantly hugged my legs, while saying "i Love you bonda..thank you sooooo much"

(yes, she is a drama queen, just like her dramamama)

so, that is tip number 1. keep on reading for further tips on how to make Jasmine happy.

over and out.

Strange But True

went for a girly drinking session with Yatt and Warda yesterday after work. we were chatting and somehow, we started talking about the latest movies. so i told them that all husbands men should watch Obsessed, so that they would know how women perceive things.

my question is:

Why Do Women Tend To Read Between The Lines When There Is No Line To Begin With?!

if you are trying to be in denial by saying you are not included in the stated group, fine.

but if you have EVER asked your partner "what are you thinking about?" when he is just being quiet, then you are included. whether you like it or not.

i always have been one of the above stated.

i always feel that something is stuck inbetween, when there is no inbetween to begin with.

it is a bad habit,i know. but i can't seem to stop!

heeeeeeeeellllllllpppppp!

psssst - no, i DO NOT stalk people and wear only my sexay undergarments underneath my trenchcoat. coz:

1. i do not own a trenchcoat
2. its been a long time since i have actually worn matching panties and bras. i do have sets, but am just too scared lazy to wear them together
3. my extra fat would scare the shit out of anyone!

my little lawyer

i dunno whether to smack her or hug her.

she has recently picked up the art of 'eavesdropping'

and she has been using whatever she has heard to justify, remind, nag, repeat or sometimes even blackmail.

sigh.

yesterday, i was telling hubby a joke about how a kid wanted to blackmail her mom who was gonna punish her by telling her grandma that she saw the mummy kiss daddy's pee pee.

and i thought the tv was loud enough to cover my voice.

apparently, the lil missy had practised filtered listening technique.

swhe came up to me later that night and asked,

"Bonda, was it you or the other mommy who was kissing the daddy's pee pee?"

o.O

you see? just imagine if she were to go around school telling this to her friends and the teachers.

i could get caught for errr...something bad la kut.

so, i had to sit down with her and explain to her exasperatedly gently that it was actually kissing the daddy's pipi (cheek)

aiyooo...ni baru 5 years old. by the time she is 15....*shakes head*

A Letter To My Loved Ones

to my dearest hubby, Jasmine and Rashard,

I have never written a letter for all three of you on my blog. i must admit that i am stealing this from diyana, who will religiously write to miki every now and then. and the reason why i am doing this 'cetak-rompaking' is because i am at wits end trying to find a way to make all 3 of you to understand, without feeling that i do not love you guys anymore.

it is normal for women to feel this way. heck, even guys want to experience it too. i know it might not be a biggie to some, but to me, it is an important experience that i would like to have without having to share it with you guys. again, like i said, this does not mean that i love you less.

and i know you sayang, you sometimes have your romantic streak where you just can't keep your eyes (and hands, and other digits) away from me...and that you want to share these few precious moments together. i understand and i thank you, but then again, there are certain times where i DO NOT want you.

and Jasmine, i know that you are growing up sooo quickly but you still have your separation anxiety. but honey, you are a big girl now, and you have to learn to be independent. i know sometimes you will cry, but then again, i am gonna be firm on this matter. please remember that i love you always.

and baby rashard. my darling that wakes up as early as me, making me rush while trying to prepare for work,for fear that you will fall off the bed. i love you to bits and i know you won't be able to understand this yet, but daddy and kakak will explain to you once you get older. please remember, i love you too, and don't hate me for doing this, as i must. or i'll end up insane.

so, with a hopeful heart, i just want to ask from all three of you...

will it be possible if you all could let me sh1t in peace?!

for once, let me sit on my 'throne' and allow me to do my 'deposits' without having to yell to all 3 of you!

let me be able to sit and concentrate. and just have a blissful crap.

do not call my name.

do not ask me where your phone/wallet/watch/car keys is. you can wait. you will not die. and i'm not gonna be sh1tting the whole day, so therefore, you will survive.

do not bang/knock/push the door. i have locked it so deal with it (yes, especially you, lil missy)

do not repeatedly ask me what i am doing inside there.

do not cry/wail/vomit/throw a tantrum (yes, both of you kiddos)

do not ask me to come out cos you want to shee shee. our house has 2 toilets. the other one is the same as this one, only a different colour. learn to use it.

do not ask me to hurry up just because you need to leave soon. pass the kids to bibik. leave me alone.

there, i think i have made myself clear.

so, to my dearest hubby, Jasmine and Rashard, please, i beg all of you again....

LET ME SH!T IN PEACE!

then, maybe then, i can become a better wife and Bonda to all of you.

thanking all of you in advance.

with lots of love,

Bonda